Pretty much everyone in the world has at least one kink, whether they know it or not. They might not say it’s a kink, but if they like the lights on, for example, or to be on top, or even if they just like a woman’s legs or ass excessively, that’s technically a fetish. Fetishes and kinks are awesome, and you should definitely look for people that will play them with you – as long as you do it right. Unfortunately, a lot of men seem to think that a one-night stand is the perfect place to bring up certain kinks that they can’t get filled anywhere else, which can lead to some uncomfortable moments for everyone involved. Here are some kinks that you just shouldn’t bring up on the first date or a one night stand:
Everyone has kinks, and we’re not judging what yours are. However, if you do have kinks involving stuff that properly belongs in a toilet (for the sake of this article, we’ll refer to them as water sports and scat), don’t bring it up on the first date. These are kinks that are commonly turn-offs for most people to the level of making them want to leave entirely. If you value the time you’re spending with this woman, don’t bring them up on the first date. The only exception to this is if you met on a site or in a place that’s specifically for extremely kinky dating, and you let her know about it before you met up in person. Otherwise, keep it safely tucked away until much later.
Again, we don’t want to judge about whether kinks are good. As long as they’re practiced with respect and safety, we don’t have a problem with any specific kinks. However, you need to be very careful if you’re going to practice consent play with your partner. This involves any time someone says “no” and means “yes,” or if someone is unable to consent due to being intoxicated, asleep, underage, disabled, or gagged. Consent play can be fun with a partner, once you work out the boundaries and safe words, but you shouldn’t practice something like this with someone you don’t already know and trust. This is a bad idea for you and for the girl you’re hooking up with, so make sure and leave it until a more appropriate time.
Role-playing can be a fun activity even on the first date, if you’re into that and she is. However, there are certain fantasies that you should wait to introduce, especially if this is just a one night stand. Many people, for example, enjoy role-plays where one partner symbolizes someone from their past. This requires a great deal of trust and commitment to the role so that you don’t accidentally step on someone’s emotional toes, and you shouldn’t trust your emotional well being to someone you’ve only just met. This can be great, but wait for a later date.