“Don’t be afraid to tell your fetish to her”

If you have a fetish you’re not sure is exactly normal but you definitely want to try it out, a one night stand might be the way to go. If you’re embarrassed about it, this is an especially good idea, because you won’t have to deal with seeing her the day, week, or month after if you don’t want to. Of course, the downside of sharing your fetish with a one night stand is that you don’t really have time to ease her into it, and you might freak her out. You don’t want her to think you’re JUST the guy who’s really into this one weird thing, and you run the risk of her refusing outright. If it’s worth it to you to run these risks, go ahead—and we’ve put together a plan for how you can make sure to have the best chance of success with getting her to live your dreams.

Tell Her Early

If you think that there’s a chance the woman you’re talking to online is going to be interested in your fetish, ask her. Ask her before you meet. We’re not saying you have to put it in your introductory email, of course. You might want to wait until the third or even fourth message, depending on how many you exchange and how fast it’s going between the two of you. Make sure you’re not being a bully about it, and just let her know that it’s something you’d really like to do, preferably with her. More often than not, this kind of honesty will lead her to be accepting, possibly even enthusiastic about partaking in your fetish, depending on the woman and the fetish.

Let Her Know Whether It’s Optional

“Do not force your fetish on her”

If you need to have someone engage in your fetish in order to have a good sexual experience, any woman you’re hooking up with needs to know this. They need to know before you hook up with them. It’s very important that you have a clear understanding of what is at stake, when you’re exchanging messages and before you actually meet up in person. If your fetish is optional, go ahead and let her know that. Say, “It’s not necessary, and I’m open to hooking up without it, but I’d like to try…”

Offer to Trade

If it’s drastically important for you to have this fetish in a hookup and you’re worried she’ll say no, or if she’s acting hesitant, offer to trade one of her fetishes for one of yours. Don’t ask her straight-out if she has a fetish, but ask her if she has any fantasies she’s been dying to have fulfilled. Chances are, the girl you’re meeting might be just as much of a freak between the sheets as you are, and possibly even more of one if she’s never gotten the chance to express it. You might even happen upon a new fetish of your own in making all of her fantasies come true.